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Writing for the Web
An Open And Shut Case...
6An open and shut case for xyz luggage. 7 When it comes to music centres, .comes to xxxxx. You may find them all pretty hard to believe, but I assure you they're true representations; and I will forebear to bore you with the three hundred others I have readily to hand.
Now these lines have one thing in common. They say absolutely nothing; and they offer likewise. Their empty platitudinizing, far from encouraging a prospect to dig a little more deeply into the ad, sends him scurrying for cover. What on earth do these ads think they are doing taking up good and valuable paid-for space? Worse, I know for a fact that some of them were put together under the auspices of agencies.
So you see, there is still plenty of room in the copywriting world for bright minds. Particularly if they have the happy knack of being able to find more interesting ways of presenting basically uninteresting propositions. That's exactly what copywriters are overpaid to do. To prove that I know roughly what I'm talking about, I propose here and now to contrive a basically uninteresting proposition and, with any luck, devise an attractive solution.
(I realize that this could result in my downfall in your eyes, but I'll risk it.) We'll take as the product, right off the top of the head, a common-or-garden photocopier. Our imaginary client is the main-dealer for a brand-name copier. He merchandizes these from half-a-dozen outlets in a given area. However, his competitors do exactly the same, in the same area, for various other top name copiers. For the sake of argument, let's call his product the Transcript Copier.
Now, to make things even more indifferent, the prices of Transcript are pegged by the manufacturer. So our man cannot bump the opposition by cutting prices. On top of that, the Transcript company does its own national advertising.
Which means we are not pushing Transcript as a good buy per se, just as a good buy from our client - whom we shall call Bradley. Pretty dreary stuff on the surface; though we've got to do something - so let's do something. By digging a little bit deeper, we discover that Bradley not only sells Transcript, but also makes a good living from the servicing of them. He does this on a contract basis by, we are told, a fairly competent team of his own engineers....next: >>